Puppy Biting. Arm Yourself

Okay, so I knew that puppies go through teething and obviously they will want to play in the same fashion as they would their litter mates. It’s all part of the learning through play experience for pups and it’s all lovely and cute and ‘ooh ouch he’s nibbling me in the most endearing way.’

Cheeky chap

Except no, it is not endearing or delightful or adorable after the first day. It’s downright fucking relentless, and they have evil little needle teeth that are made for puncturing my beautiful skin, I’ll be honest it’s fucking painful. I knew that the Dachshund breed is pretty ballsy and what they lack in size they make up in attitude, he honestly thinks he’s a German Shepherd sometimes.

In the grand scheme of things Fletcher is a fairly well behaved pup, I have been conscious to expose him to as many different situations as possible, so I think that’s helped quite a lot as nothing really phases him. I mean, obviously he does have his moments where he is running in circles around the room barking, and being a lunatic, and the inevitable peeing and pooping where he shouldn’t but the puppy biting, the puppy biting is something else. Everyone has told me it will eventually phase out after he’s finished teething, and he will be a nice, normal dog. But when he is trying to assassinate me in the morning making noises like a gremlin that’s been fed after midnight, I’m not convinced.

He really is the best alarm clock I’ve ever had, I actually got woken up by him biting my eyes a few mornings back. And then once I’ve started to wake up he launches his attack, he doesn’t stop for at least 30 mins, by which time I am ready to launch him through the window as 0230 in my opinion is not the ideal time to have a play fight. It always makes me wonder why people would ever have children if puppies are this bad because surely kids must be worse? Like why put yourself through it?

In order to combat his biting I have been doing all sorts, the main one that seems to work is ignoring him, although it’s working very fucking slowly. Works much better during the day when I’m up and about and keen for dog training, but when he’s actually woken me up from my slumber its much more difficult to get back to sleep as he whines and whines, and whines a bit more, and maybe a bit of high pitched barking for good measure. He is also very very smart, and knows that if he poops then I’ll get out of bed to clean it up, and voila! I’m out of bed which means it’s defo play time. The point I’m trying to make is that basically no more sleep will happen until Fletcher is ready to allow it.

Finally given up his reign of terror.

After his episode, which happens at least twice per night, he falls asleep on me and returns to being the cutest creature on earth. What a dick.

Fletcher sleeping like an angel.

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